Je ne sais pas ce que je veux plus

Sleepwalk
Daydream

What is happening?

Something bothering you,
Is it me?
My never ending needs
To conform to society?

What happened to my
"if you don't like it, fuck you" attitude?

Why am I not working harder
To get out of here?

This semester changed everything.
Mais dame en rouge,
Tu sais que je serai là pour vous.

Are you afraid to be the only one left?
Life used to be simple.

I don't know how to give,
I don't feel like I'm there at all.

Abandonment

Maybe I can't bring myself to commit because in the end everyone would leave.

Je veux retourner à Paris

The stars a blazing like rebel diamonds cut out of the sun.

When I didn't have to answer to anyone but myself.

Mama says the Legend is so open

because at a point of time,

she believed that she had nothing left to lose.

If I could forget about everything,

and just be.

Without fear of consequences,

maybe I can finally grow.

Maybe I can finally know who I am.

I know I'm strong,

in certain ways,

I've overcome and learnt from my experiences.

but that's the thing,

it's My Own Experiences.

If you see someone you love reaching for a fire,

and no matter what you say,

they still continue to reach for it,

what will you do?

I'd let them get burn.

Because then they'll learn.

Tough love.

Tough life.

I feel like an airhead.

I'm not thinking deep thoughts,

just shallow ones.

Back there,

I was in charge of my on decisions,

my own future.

And I felt so liberated,

for the first time,

I understood why

teens say they want more "freedom"

Because we're so bloody protected from the world,

when all we want to do

is see it,

and learn.

Somnambulisme

Listen to the Croz

You made me believe that

There's still hope.

But now,

I'm burned out.

I'm dead.

It used to be,

just get through this,

'cause sooner or later,

it'll be over.

But now I know

over doesn't last.

C'est pour ça que je redoute rentrer à la maison?

Let Me Out

and today you accidentally called me,

"baby"

Everyday is a reminder

of what I hate most in life.

The lack of control,

the soulless days where by

I'm just sleepwalking the whole day.

I want to be back when we were 16.

And just stay there,

when we didn't have any of these choices.

I want life to go on.

I don't want to be 17 anymore.

I honestly don't know what you want,

honestly,

will it be awkward?

Yes.

Do I want to be friends?

What will that mean?

How do we start again?

I don't want to make any decisions

now that I'm vulnerable.

I'm only 17,

I don't want to be one of the zombies in the train

that don't have any dreams,

or forgotten that they had any to begin with.

you took everything else away,

please let me keep this.

Tout que je peux penser est le sexe, la drogue et l'alcool.

fuck you for thinking what I did was punishing you for what you did,

fuck you for saying that you don't know what you did to deserve it.

you stopped listening,

and I grew up.

don't say it as if I abuse you.

don't say it as if I don't

hold you or

slow down.

don't tell me that you're perfect,

don't tell me that you never made a single mistake.

if it weren't for you,

where would I be right now?

I'm OK (subtext)

I'm tired of walking on eggshells,

So terrified to fail.

And in order to please you,

I abandon myself.

And though it used to hurt me

when you pushed me away,

What

Am

I

Going

To

Do

When

This

All

Ends.

Je ne veux pas faire de psychologie, je ne veux pasapprendre les sciences, je ne veux pas faire des affaires, je ne veux pas faire de la chirurgie, je ne veux pas couper les morts vers le haut. Je veux agir, c'est que trop difficile à comprendre? Non, c'est juste pourpas chers à destination.

How I wish you knew,

how much I need you.

I feel like running,

but I can't abandon you.

You avoid my gaze,

withdraw from me these days.

You punish me,

from trying to be,

all that you wanted.

What more can I do?

et vous, vous êtes le président. et vous me juger surmes propres opinions? contradiction ne même pas commencer à le couvrir. Je peux agir. Je le sais. ne pense pas que tu es meilleur que moi. juste pour quevous le savez, les gens qui me regardent de haut, j'ai tendance à prouver qu'ils ont tort.

I'm stronger than ever,

you made me this way.

But I Am A Good Girl

Fuck Lewis

How long will it take for you to understand that I don't want a job where I am constantly hating my life. I don't want to live life knowing I have no where to go and me constantly wanting to end everything and just give up.

I had a nightmare, that I couldn't act anymore. Because I forgot how.

I gave up talking to you. Because I know how fucking futile it will be. You don't know better, because you never dreamed big enough.

You can't say what I have or what I don't, because you've never experienced it.

Will things be okay?

Do I risk it all?

Come this far,

just to fall?

It's Been A Lifetime Hasn't It?

What I did.

Was it right?

Where is everyone,

when I need them?

You can't tell me to relax

and just "go for dinner for now"

because I don't have the time.

I'm starting to like my job.

Even though there's that voice that says

I can't cope.

The pain of not knowing what's going on.

Why did I agree to do something

I don't believe in?

Why on Earth am I so...

weak.

Things take time,

and heal.

I know everything happens for a reason,

but what am I supposed to do now?

Turn Me Inside Out.

I did everything right.

I studied hard.

I did what you wanted.

I didn't choose the risky choice.

I chose something safer over something I loved.

I did something completely Singaporean.

I listened to you.

I know we've had this conversation.

I know that's why I'm not talking to you.

I don't know why I'm doing this anymore.

I wonder what will happen now that I love my job.

I don't know why I hate the school.

I did everything right.

Why aren't I happy?

I Know How Georgia Feels.

to be the one who is as good as anyone else.

to be the one who is trying so hard to not screw up.

to work harder than Nikki,

but to watch her step into the spotlight

time and time again.

Being tired of being sad.

Being sad to not be interesting enough,

not funny enough,

not good at imitations,

not bad enough.

If I could have another second to think,

I'd tell you that I'm scared.

I needed your advice

but you were never around.

You guys are amazing.

How I'm a stereotype for crying now,

kinda makes me smile.

Comment est-il que quelque chose que j'aime peutme rend si heureux encore si triste en meme temps?

Dear Elfin;

Can't love no one else,

'til you love yourself.

And if they don't like it,

tell 'em:

Get in line,

and kiss your ass.

Muah!

I think a lot of people have forgotten about this place,

but if you're looking at this,

know that you're awesome.

You came such a long way,

and I'm so proud of you.

You played such a important part in the 2 short years we were friends.

You supported me when I was at my low points,

and celebrated with me when life wasn't so bitchy.

No amount of XOXOs will be enough,

so thank you,

and happy birthday ah ma!

Parce qu'ils m'ont entendu la première fois.

I serve it up in a shot,

so suck it down like a man.

Thought I would forget,

Didn't you?

I remember.

It hurts because,

I thought I found you,

at last.

Do you not understand,

you of all people

should know.

Thank you for making me feel "SO SECURE"

really,

love me for me,

bitch.

I'm trying really hard

to want to miss you.

I'm trying really hard

to see past the "who cares" attitude.

I'm trying really hard

to be excited about anything.

There used to be something.

I used to dream.

In Fifty Years or So

You can like the life you're living,

You can live the life you like.

It's funny how when I talk to you, I can feel so completely alone.

It's funny how I used to be able to tell you anything, but it's like you don't know what boundaries are or when some places are inappropriate for certain topics.

It's funny how you seem to not understand who I am, the looks you give me.

I'm happy you don't ask me anymore, because the answer ain't you now.

Aren't We Supposed to Dream Big?

Oh Miss Mango tank top,

where are you when I need your advice the most?

Oh Madre,

how could you doubt this,

when you knew how much it hurt me in the past?